Interesting.

I think that I tried to be stronger than I really was. I tried to pretend like I really didn't care. I even made some pretty callous (sp?) comments about the situation. But here is how I feel:

Yes, I had sex with your girl. No, I am not proud of it. Yes, it was good. No, it wasn't worth me feeling like this or her feeling bad either. I listened to what you had to say because I felt like I owed you. But I think you are doing whatever you have to do to keep her in your love and that includes being "cool" with me. Kinda like facing your demons because you think there is some salvation in it. And maybe... there is. I don't really know. Yes, I am glad that you two stayed together because if y'all had broken up... she'd have been single. Cuz I don't want to be her girlfriend. I know me enough to know better. That doesn't mean that I love or respect her any less. She is a wonderful, caring person... I just don't know how to explain how I feel I guess. But for some reason, seeing the picture of y'all together... after all this time, hurt me. I mean, like Karma had a gun and shot me 2 or 3 times close range in the SOUL. And that... I cannot explain. Not at all.

I was good mood wise till then. I could take Her saying that "our being intimate strengthened your relationship." I could take you being condescending... I could take you calling me selfish even though I know how you meant it. I can take so many things, but just not that. And everyone wants to be so fukkin' cool. Ha! I think neither one of you fukkers should hit me up. Just continue to heal your relationship. My time to be in the middle of it is over. I'm done.